My First Holiday Without Him

Connor died in February so the first major holiday without him was Easter.  Honestly, it was really painful.  When Connor was little, we’d go to my best friend’s house and do a huge Easter egg hunt.  There was always one golden egg that had a $100 that would be very difficult to find, but year after year, Connor always found his way to the golden egg.  Always.  It would frustrate his brother and cousin so much that it sometimes resulted in tantrums.  I have no idea how he did it because the hiding places were quite tough.

This Easter I invited any of his fraternity brothers to come for dinner that did not have a place to go.  We had a couple show up in addition to 13 family members.  It was really nice to be around everyone.   

Ryan and I decided that it would be a good way to honor Connor if we hid a golden egg in his memory.  His fraternity brother and roommate found it.  He was so happy and I know Connor was cheering him on. His fraternity brothers then sat for over an hour playing cards with Ryan, laughing and having a good time.  I think it was somewhat therapeutic for us to be with some of the “brothers” Connor loved and who are now serving as big brothers to Ryan. I hadn’t seen Ryan smile like that in a while, which made me happy. ∞